This is My Body

The last of the three pending posts. I thought I had posted this one on Monday. If I have already put this one out, I apologize for the duplication. So much on my mind. And it has been a really long hard day. God did good to give me the new skirt. I think He should have given me ice cream also...I needed ice cream today.

Happy New Year, my friends!
New year. New books. New ideas. New clothes. New understanding. New love.

Reflecting on the past year, I recall how someone important taught me a great and wonderful lesson. Of to be very truthful, taught me the beginnings of a great virtue: waiting.

I am not a person who waits well. I have a colorful personality, an Irish personality traced out in a French temperament and that means the sparks fly when I don't get my own way....right now.

I saw Fr. John's eyes roll just a hair when I told him about being the first woman in electronics in high school. The tiny movement told this great hunter exactly what he was thinking. Or not...

When I decide I want something, I want it NOW. I could go down the tragic path and say that I've had so much violence in my life that I only know and understand a warrior's mind...and this captain wants her orders followed without question. It is one reason why I love and am satisfied with movies and shows of women warriors.

My body woke me at midnight to begin my new book of the Liturgy of the Hours. I wrote for an hour and then prayed an hour longer. Something inside me just knows what it is supposed to do, even when I don't.

Last night at Mass, I heard the Angelus bells and I dropped to my knees right where I was and prayed...and the usher came up to me and said, "Take your seat, please, we are starting Mass now>" And I am thinking, no you are not, the Mass does not begin until AFTER the bells stop...I have until then...leave me alone, but explaining that would have removed me from my prayer. I simply obeyed. And then I apologized after Mass.

Waiting is just not one of my strong points, but last year, I found someone to trust enough to learn how to wait. And I discovered a new great joy in it. This wild animal, this great hunter, is slowly becoming civilized.

It's about time.

Actually it's about "This is my Body."

Found myself in tears yesterday morning at Mass when I thought more about those words, which have always spoken to me deeply. I didn't hear those words yesterday.
What I heard was:

"This is my heart, given up for you."

And I wept because the it made sense, the whole thing: We must love because He first love us.

I imagined Jesus standing there, telling me, "I love you. You have my heart." and then microseconds later, "Use it."

Kind of an odd thing. If it is "This is my Body" then it is also:
This is my Heart: love one another
These are my Hands: feed my sheep
This is my Voice: sing me a new song


I have to leave now. But I just wanted to share it with you.

Happy New Year, Happy Anniversary. May your time of waiting be filled with joy.
The child you carry will carry us all.

Love, Cindy